Setting Boundaries

If you lay down in front of someone enough times, even the nicest person will eventually walk all over you. 

When we have no boundaries, and are constantly seeking to please others, we leave ourselves vulnerable to being taken advantage of. Even if other people aren’t intending to take advantage of you, it eventually happens when we are constantly giving into requests instead of setting limits. 

Having healthy boundaries are key to living a healthy life. These boundaries are limits we put into place to make sure we are healthy both mentally and emotionally. When you are making sure that you are getting your own needs met, you are able to help others get their needs met as well. Poor boundaries can lead to resentment, anger, and frustration. 

Healthy boundaries involve knowing where you end and another person begins. They are an imperative aspect of every relationship in our lives, so it’s important to be confident around your boundaries! After all, we are constantly teaching people how to treat us, and if we don’t show them, they won’t know. 

This is great news, because you get to set the limits around what you will and will not tolerate!

If you haven’t had much practice in setting boundaries, it might feel a little intimidating at first. That’s okay! It will get easier with practice, I promise. 

Here are a few tips you can use when setting boundaries in your life:

  • Kind but firm! Your boundaries are non-negotiable, but you don’t need to be rude or aggressive in order for others to understand and respect them. Using statements that describe how you feel rather than focusing on the other person can help to keep your communication clear.
  • “No” is a complete sentence. You aren’t obligated to explain your reasoning for your boundaries or to get other people’s approval. You don’t owe anyone an explanation.
  • Be willing to follow through. Part of setting healthy boundaries is having a plan of action for when your boundaries aren’t respected. What will you do if someone violates the boundary you’ve set? Have a plan and be willing to stick to it.

One of the best ways to figure out your boundaries is to get really clear about your desires, setting limits based on what you’ve discovered you want from your relationships, and making sure to communicate those boundaries with the people in your life. 

Healthy boundaries can be the difference between a healthy, enjoyable relationship and one that is painful and toxic. It’s also critical to remember to respect other people’s boundaries as well! 

Keeping open and honest communication in the relationships you have in your life will ensure that both parties feel heard and respected. 

What are some boundaries you feel you’ve confidently set in your life? Which boundaries are you currently working on?

If you would like to learn how to set boundaries and learn more about how life coaching can help you, schedule your FREE Breakthrough Coaching Call with Lori HERE .

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