What if I told you that you are manifesting your reality through the words that you say? Literally speaking your life into existence. Giving us the power to have everything we’ve ever wanted, or more commonly, develop unhelpful patterns that we experience on a loop; sometimes even for generations. I want you to know that this concept is about understanding your inner ability and power to change your life through the words that you speak aloud.
How The Words We Say Create Our Life
To kick this off I want to start with an exercise. I want you to take a piece of paper and create a table of 3 categories: one for yourself, one for your family and one for your friends. In these sections take a moment to write down the first words that come to mind when you think of these people. Do these words reflect how you speak about them daily?
An important piece of this is to acknowledge that a majority of the interactions in our lives act as a mirror. How we think and feel is typically projected back to us. In concept, it’s not about controlling others, but more about having control of the energy between you. If you have the wherewithal to approach a relationship with clarity and intention, you will often find that people often desire to interact positively and amicably.
On the other hand, remember that if you’re letting your limiting beliefs and inner wounds run the show, then you will likely find yourself in unhelpful and even toxic patterns that keep you stuck. These subconscious beliefs are often instilled in us at an early age, which is why we call this the “inner child”. As children, we don’t have a full view of the world yet and we can only comprehend a fraction of situations. This is why these beliefs are usually hard to explain or justify because they were created from a time in our lives when we didn’t know everything we do now. They were not derived to help us grow, but more to keep us safe.
For example, women who are particularly aware of their bodies or looks often have a subconscious belief that it is not safe to be attractive or seen. Maybe your mother made comments about certain characteristics or styles being promiscuous, perhaps you grew into your womanly body at a younger age and it caused some bullying and unwanted attention. It could be that you feared rejection so much that you would rather be invisible than experience that in your life. Whatever the case may be, the child version of yourself created beliefs to protect the future you, but now, as an adult, these beliefs may be doing more harm than good.
When a belief no longer serves us it will undoubtedly become toxic, and in this case, what used to make you feel safe may cause you to feel self-conscious which can hinder your ability to love and appreciate yourself.
That being said, take note of the words that you say and identify whether or not they stem from a present, conscious belief, or if they are stemming from an unhelpful subconscious belief that no longer serves you. The first step to creating your dream life through your words is to become conscious of your thoughts and intentional in every facet of your life.
Humble to a Fault
A major way we block ourselves from creating our best life through our words is by succumbing to negative ways of thinking and harmful self-talk. This most often looks like being so humble that it actually hurts you and the life you’re trying to create.
For example, the concept of waiting for the other shoe to drop or it’s “too good to be true”. When you go about life expecting bad things to happen you may unconsciously be inviting those situations or circumstances into your life. Many people, use these narratives to avoid disappointment, but it’s not one or the other. Positive thinking and risking being disappointed, or negative thinking and avoiding disappointment. You could decide that whatever is meant for you will be, that the world is always working in your favor, and that life isn’t happening to you, but for you.
Thinking like this can invite so much more positivity and goodness into your life.
In terms of negative self-talk, there is a prominent societal norm that it is frowned upon to speak highly of yourself. You don’t want to come across as though you are bragging, so therefore you essentially avoid talking about your good qualities or accomplishments. However, this is likely one of the main reasons why you’re not getting the jobs you want, being treated the way you want by the people in your life, and not landing remarkable opportunities. It’s because you are consciously speaking out into the world that you don’t believe that you’re worthy.
We think that being hard on ourselves will make us better, but energetically we are putting ourselves down as if we are digging a hole rather than building a staircase. As the psychologist, Carl Rogers put it “The curious paradox is that when I accept myself, just as I am, then I can change.” In the coming weeks, I challenge you to start actively acknowledging your positive, powerful, and unique traits. Like, attract like, so notice how when you do this more goodness will flow your way simply because you’re being yourself and loving who you are.
Kickstart Your Dream Life
Now that you fully understand how our words create our lives here are a few actionable steps to kickstart a massive change and a step forward in creating your dream life.
Act as if.
Speak as if you have everything you want and are exactly who you want to be, living the life you’ve always desired. Go out into the world fully believing that you are worthy and deserving of good things. Expect people to treat you kindly everywhere you go and treat them the same in return. Start to believe on a core level that everything you want is meant for you and that there is nothing that you can’t have. Do this and simply watch how much your life will change in a matter of days.
Speak about yourself and others with love and care.
Try to spend a certain amount of time ONLY speaking positively. Whether that be for a whole conversation, for a whole day, or a whole week. Actively refrain from complaining about your job. Stop yourself if you feel the need to complain about your loved one or coworker. When you look in the mirror and feel like saying something negative, try saying 3 positive things in that moment.
All of these conscious steps will become habits over time, and before you know it you’ll be experiencing massive changes all around you, simply because you spoke it into existence.
Approach situations to understand and see why someone is acting in a certain way.
Once you realize that everything is a mirror and most people are acting out of their inner child, you’ll approach situations with a lot more clarity and understanding. Getting offended will become a rare occurrence and conflicts will often dissipate. Moving forward with your positive life, I encourage you to lead by example. Go about your life believing that good things get to happen and let others know that they can have that too.
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